Quotebook: NCU

Why do people have to question everything? -Amber Ruffo

Oh I'm sorry... did I hurt your thoughts? -Whitney Drury

(Jeremiah Daly is coughing)
SAM THULIN: Stop puking!
JEREMIAH: I'm not puking, I'm coughing.
SAM: (authoritatively) STOP... PUKING!

If you were to sum up your feelings right now into one noise, what would it be? -Phil

During the first few years of Nero's ministry... -Prof. Robert Bernard

So if toast always lands butter side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap buttered toast on the back of a cat? -Aaron Bannin

You're just jealous because I can make an origami ball out of a Starburst wrapper. -Joel Morris

I'm not saying I'm better than you -- I'm saying I'm MUCH better. -Scott Smith

I OWN you San Diego!! You are my WOMAN! -Wams (Aaron Walmsley) playing football on his PS2

The simple pleasures in life are the best... unlike those complex pleasures that screw you.

You think conducting legato is gay?? -Larry Bach, incredulous, to a student in Conducting II

I'm going to shoot you with a gun. -Dr. J to his piano students when they are not doing something right

Would you write B?! -Dr. J, to himself in music theory class

So... what do you think about Mongolian chicks? -Matt Riley

Do you realize that we've been talking absolute nonsense for the last five minutes? -Chuck Skoda, King of Condescension

Everything in this world is edible except for toxins.

Often in theology it's very useful to digress. -Prof. William Barnes

Peace, my mohammuds. -Eric Spata, in benediction as he left the apartment

My brain doesn't think... ever. -Brandon West

ME: She's going to teach abroad.
PHIL: To do what?

I laugh a lot. That's why I'm not fat. -Lydia Clark

Hey! I just used this fallacy today! -Aaron Bannin, after learning about the "false dilemma"

I wish it were possible to violently sigh.

How do you offend a seventh grader? They eat their own boogers! -Wams, talking about lawsuits filed by the parents of "offended" seventh graders.

Have you noticed that no one ever dares you to do something intelligent? -Aaron

Listen to you: "Me me me me"... what about MY needs? -Phil

PHIL: You think too much.
ME: Do I? Hmmm...

ME: How can we go from 90 degrees to snow in like 2 days?
JOSH WYANT: Weather sprites!

There are only two people I would want to ask me to lay on them, and my bed is one of them. -Phil

The other one's your chess board. -Aaron Bannin, in response, later

Chess board like a fox! -Phil

We're gonna play chess like a fox! -Aaron

I did butt-squat today! -Wams

Could you rephrase that in a more complex way so I can understand it? -Chuck Skoda

I don't make sense, because I'm a girl. I'm a walking conundrum. -Ruthie Bjorkman

ME: What's that in your butt, Phil?
PHIL: They're SAIs!

Mom, I DARE you to make me cookies. -Aaron

We did the same in grad school; we'd get there early to get the most obscure seat. -Prof. Barnes

If you've got a girl in Venice, you're obviously doing something right. -Tanner Hockensmith

Larry Bach owns my soul. -Aaron Bannin

You know one of the craziest things to ever do? Is if you have a fishing pole... go into the middle of the woods and stick it straight up in the air, and there will be like 10 bats around it. -André Rodriguez, 1:00am, unexpectedly, from his bed

I'm not racist; I hate everybody the same. I'm an equal-opportunity discriminator. -Scott Smith

(Phil is playing guitar)
ME: You got a good ear, man.
PHIL: I got a good ear, but a crappy finger!

It goes without saying that... -Caleb Moore

LUKE SCHNEIDER: My fiancée is so hot, if you looked at her you would turn to salt.
AARON: She's as hot as Sodom?

Basically, so to speak, what I was trying to say, in respect to, and however not limited to, the above mentioned particular as well as and often beforehand but nevertheless crucial and straight to the point arriving at the conclusion of whence it came to my attention therefore presented in a particular matter. -Joel Morris

Unfortunately, there's a big market for good fusion in elevators. -Pete Shu on fusion jazz being mislabeled "elevator music"

There was one other racist comment I was going to make. -Aaron, trying to think of it

ME: Sometimes things just don't work out.
ERIC SPATA: ...and sometimes you just gotta push harder.